When someone offers to pull the chair out for you at a dinner table, the least decent thing to do is, sit.
Alas ! That was the last reaction I had when someone did the same to me. It was like he slapped my face with molten lava and then aired me through it. Yes, I get uncomfortable when men go out of their way to make me feel, erm, for the lack of a better word, delicate. Not that I do weights in the gym every alternate day. But for some reason, I could never conform to these ghostly rituals handed down to us.
The incident at hand is where I went frolicking about to a luncheon with a friend(read male friend). As we entered the seating area, the footman swiftly flew behind my back, towards the left and pulled the breadth of a splendid dining chair out. He pulled it to quite a distance, not that I was offended. My immediate reaction was to pretend as if the chair to my right was the only one I could see in the entire hall. And so I seated myself, leaving the attendant flushed, and my male company annoyed.
No. There is no reasonable explanation for that behavior, is there ? But I should go on to explain how I felt in those seconds. It was utter bafflement. And this feeling has crept up my spine every time something of the sort happens.
I do not understand how can you pull out a chair for any one person in a dining space, and leave the other poor bloke with a similar exercise all to himself, while I get to revel in the glory of a little less work the nice man saved me. Isn’t that, I don’t know, unjust ? Does that not promote inequality of a kind ?
And well, I definitely, am not singing the song about how it makes us, women, feel weak, yaadaa.. yaadaa.. Because it doesn’t.
Chivalry is one of the more gorgeous interpretations of communication between people, for what it’s worth, it is also one of the most misunderstood concepts of every generation combined.
Originating from the Knighthood in early centuries and refined to moral manifestations in today’s age, chivalry has come to indicate a man’s high moral fibre, if shown to a woman of similar noted culture, above or below inclusive.
To me and my conduct, chivalry is more consistent with the meaning of kindness to one another.
I remember being 13 and holding the door to my guy friends at a restaurant or making way for them if I was walking too slow(which happened often) or open the car door to my brother, who was busy shuffling through the glove compartment searching for God-remembers-what, and I recall distinctively pulling out the chair for my father on several occasions of meals shared together. And. I’d do it for every woman counterpart in a heart beat.
Why does chivalry have to be held as a synonym to the conduct of a man ?
How come we do not make it equally accessible to every gender ?
After all, when it rains, a man might like an umbrella being shared with him too, as much as a woman would.
In this day and age, when almost everyone educated and in their right minds, is calling out for equality and demanding to be viewed first as a human, and then as a male, female, hand-bag, it is only fair to extend something as regular as chivalry to our fellow-men. It is only ordinary to treat them as we would prefer to be treated.
Of course, this comes from a place where women occasionally enjoy the charm behind chivalry, despite great internal resistance.
But we promise to throw open our Prada coats over the puddle, and let a man walk over it.
Kidding. Never the Prada.